God….I’m so in love.
This man is a god of art among mere mortals
SAM SPRATT’S SPRING PORTRAIT CONTEST/CUSTOM PORTRAIT/SIGNED PRINT GIVEAWAY!
Spring is around the corner which means as thanks to you for following me here, as usual—I am giving TWO of you the chance to win a custom portrait made by me, custom-tailored to your heart’s desire. Free, no strings attached. The rules are simple, but read them so you can win.
What You Get:
A Web-resolution (1100 pixel) custom portrait, tailored to your most bizarre of requests. You can get a very traditional portrait done or as outlandish as you can dream. Zombies, Hipsters, Pirates, Ninjas, Superheroes, Robots, etc. are all fair-game themes in which you can have yourself transmogrified in painted form.
ADDITIONALLY, I’ll be giving 3 runner-ups their choice of a 13”x19” signed velvet archival print. Choices are: Sherlock, Ron Swanson, and Inspector Spacetime.
How to Enter:
FACEBOOK: Simply comment on the following facebook post. You get an extra entry if you click the “share” button and post it to your wall. ( Sam Spratt - Facebook Contest )
TWITTER: Follow http://twitter.com/#!/SamSpratt and tweet the following phrase verbatim on twitter:
“ Entering to win a custom portrait #painting from @samspratt’s portrait contest! https://www.facebook.com/sam.spratt ”
This also counts as an entry.
TUMBLR: Just reblog/like this post!
How long this will last:
This contest will run until April 6th, 2012.
You all are the best! Good luck and thanks again to all who follow my little slice of artwork on the web.
NOTE: You must be a follower or subscriber at the time of the win.
Why all this? Well, you’ve gotta write a big check with quite a few zeros at the end of it to commission art from me—and call me crazy, but I firmly believe that in a perfect world, people *should* get to own art AND do things like “pay rent”, “eat food-like substances on occasion”, and maybe even “continue to live”. Two of you can do that, the rest of you… you’re screwed. Sincerely, <3 Sam
To all of my friends this is nothing new.
Today is a day where I stop and think
About how clearly I am, so out of sync.
With heart-shaped boxes wherever I turn
A box with my name, is for what I yearn.
It’s plainly my fault even though I have prayed
I have no game like I’m still in 8th grade.
Oh, what on earth am I waiting for?
Some girl to walk up and looking to score?
If that even happened I’m sure I would find
Something dumb to say and change her damn mind.
So at this point, twentieth year of life
I’m not looking for a shitfucking wife.
Just someone to care, someone to hold
A person to shield from the wind and the cold.
It’s only one day for Saint Valentine
When I reserve the right to bitch and whine.
If you know someone who may be my type
Someone real cool, that isn’t all hype.
Then give them my name and maybe my number.
Because I would fuck the shit out of them.
| — | Yours Truly |






